Dead Last

I just read an older post on one of the Athena-themed blogs that I stumbled upon recently. RunAthena wrote about her feelings on a 15k that she had just finished. It was a local race and she was at the back of the pack the entire time. While running she thought back to her very first 5k when she ran with an injured knee and was greeted just short of the finish line by her sons who yelled "All right Mom! You're not last!" There were just a few elderly walkers behind her, but it was true - she was not the last one to cross the line. So while finishing the 15k and knowing she was the last person she thought back to that comment from her sons. She was literally the last person, but really she did have people behind her and always will. The runner that she once was will always be behind her. I truly could not have expressed these feelings better myself and it seems as though she lifted this scene right from my very own life.

In early May I ran the longest race that I had attemped up until that point. The local running club's spring classic 15k was going to be the practice race for my upcoming first half marathon. I had an excellent experience running the race, but I finished DEAD LAST. This happens pretty much any time I run a local race that isn't a 5k with walkers. I have literally been pushed through the course by the sweep car in my first 8k race (though I did get a PR!). Most other runners, spectators and volunteers have gone home and little or no food/drink is left at the finish line when I'm done. While at the time it does feel incredibly demoralizing, I can now certainly see that those experiences aren't all I've cracked them up to be. Because no matter when I finish, my former, non-running-self will always be the one coming in last.